Seven Quick Takes--Fourth Friday of Lent

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We’ll start with some business. :) First, if you have read my book, please leave a review on Amazon! That helps more people find it (the more reviews, the more it shows up in Amazon “related items” or whatever.)

Second, Ave Maria Press is having an ebook sale, and Living Memento Mori is part of it!

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Last week, as you know, I wrote all about Billy. You have probably seen the post from Monday, where I wrote about his death. Thank you, again, for all the comments, thoughts, and prayers for my friend, her husband, and their little boy. It’s so comforting to know that people are, as Anne Frank said, “really good at heart.”

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Here in Ohio, we’re basically shut down. We’re told to stay inside unless it’s an essential thing—like, you must work, or get groceries or food, or things like that. We can go out to exercise, as well, sot hat’s helpful. But just going out to go out and in groups is, um, discouraged highly. I live alone, so most of my days are spent in my own company, but the hardest thing is not being in contact with people—no hugs. No touching. It’s rough. I mean I’m not a hugely touchy-feely person, but I do like parental hugs! And I haven’t had any in a month (or thereabouts). Sigh. Oh well. It could be worse.

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The knitting is a lot of comfort knitting—I went into my stash and broke it down into types of yarn and then projects I can do with each type. Right now I’ve got two garter stitch scarves going and I’m going to make some washcloths with the stash of cotton dishcloth yarn I have here—why I bought so much, no idea. But knitting keeps my hands busy and it’s nice to have the feeling of getting something done and working on a project with a definitive, easy to see end! :)

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I dunno if we really need more memento mori art, but here’s one of St. Catherine of Siena:

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As far as churches go, we’re shut down at least through April 6, which is Palm Sunday. I would bet that there won’t be public celebrations of Holy Week, which is just….weird. I mean, weirder then Mass not happening publicly. I am very much hoping for streaming services for these. The Triduum liturgies are so beautiful! And my birthday is on Holy Thursday this year! That’s always special and to not have the Mass is just….again, weird. That’s really the only word I can use right now. WEIRD.

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What are you reading, writing, doing, cooking—whatever-ing—during this time? Share your ideas in the comments!

Wednesday Notebook #2

Today is the Solemnity of the Annunciation: Eight things to know and share about the Annunciation.

Simon Bening, “The Annunciation”, Getty Museum

MAKING:

English Muffin Toasting Bread (with notes on how to make it with whole wheat flour….scroll to the bottom!) It’s yummy!

Elementary Wrap

Lemony Herb Roast Chicken

A bunch of garter stitch scarves

READING:

Making A Life (Finished)

The Virgin’s Lover (yes, yes, I love Philippa Gregory, sorry guys, but I do!—finished)

The Other Queen (see above note. Sorry not sorry.)

Vanishing Fleece (finished)

Exalted (finished)

Revelation of Divine Love

The Red Lotus

Outlander (again)

Meet the Austins

WATCHING:

Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug

Hobbit: The Battle of the Five Armies

Bishop Barron’s Catholicism: The Pivotal Players series.

Links and such :

The story of Billy, if you missed it. And its follow up.

Many, many moons ago, Elizabeth Foss wrote a workshop for Lent called Restore. And it was amazing and I come back to its principles all the time. So I thought I’d share some of them with you in these notebooks. The first one is: Realize when you’re burned out, and work to get good rest. I think right now we could all use really quality sleep, because when we’re stressed sleep can fly away so quickly! Try going to bed at a set time every night and getting up at a set time in the morning. Conversely, if you’re like me and you need more sleep than usual, try to see if you can structure your days to get it—go to bed earlier, nap if you can, etc.

The whole series where she talks about renewing and restoring her life is a gift—this post has all the entries linked.

Want some science at home? Our local science museum, COSI, has a site with daily activities and exhibits to check out!

46 productive things to do instead of scrolling social media

Kids’ coloring pages from Cultivate What Matters

Bishop Barron: “Coronavirus and Sitting Quietly Alone”

Wednesday Notebook #1

Billy Love

Getting to meet Billy on Sunday

The first post I wrote about Billy is, far and away, the most popular thing I’ve ever written.

I’m so glad that so many people got to know this incredible little boy and his fabulous parents. I’m so glad—and overwhelmed in a good way—by all the comments, prayers, and e-notes I’ve received saying they are praying for Billy and his family.

Sadly, Billy passed away in his father’s arms this morning (Tuesday, March 23).

He was loved, and so cared for, until the end.

These six days they had with him were an incredible gift from God. They were a miracle. I’m sure about that. Billy wasn’t expected to last an hour. Instead, he gave his parents almost a week to rejoice and delight in him—and for us to delight in him as well.

Tiffany got to nurse him. Bill changed his diapers. They slept with him on their chests, cooed at him, took videos, rocked him, and loved him. Billy grasped their fingers and looked into their eyes. His grandparents and aunts and uncles delighted in him. And so did all of us.

The day they left the hospital, the membrane that covered Billy’s encephelocele began to break down. The neonatologist said this was to be expected. At home, the brain tissue began to bleed. But through it all Billy and his family had the love and support of their family and the wonderful hospice nurses from The Resort. Billy was kept comfortable and was always in someone’s arms. He was unbelievably loved, and only knew love his entire life.

I was so blessed to be able to see him. I was so blessed to see my best friend hold her child, her first-born, to mother him, to see Bill hold his son against his chest and feed him. I stroked his little ear and marveled at his tiny fingers and even tinier nails. I delighted in him.

On Sunday, we heard the gospel that contains my life verse—Jesus healing the man born blind. My verses are taken from the beginning of the gospel’s ninth chapter:

As Jesus passed by, he saw a man blind from birth. His disciples asked him, “Rabbi, who sinned, this man or his parents, that he was born blind?” Jesus answered, “Neither this man nor his parents sinned. He was born blind so that God’s works might be revealed in him.”

I don’t know why I was born the way I was—but God does. I don’t know why Billy was born the way he was—but God does.

Maybe we were both born this way so that we can glorify God. I certainly hope so. That’s what gives me comfort, and that’s why I consider this my life verse.

Billy’s short life glorified God. His parents’ faith and love glorified God. The support, community, love, and prayers of all of you for this little family glorified God.

A few weeks ago, Bill and Tiffany’s church had a luncheon for them, to celebrate Billy and to provide support for Tiff and Bill. At the lunch, we made a quilt, where every guest was invited to write something to Tiff and Bill on a square. The quilt was draped over their couch when I went to visit. It is beautiful.

I had brought my Bible with me, and I spent time going through it, wondering what to write. Finally, I settled on one of my favorite verses. It’s the verses that begins the epilogue of my book.

“God himself will be with them;
he will wipe every tear from their eyes.
Death will be no more;
mourning and crying and pain will be no more,
for the first things have passed away.”

 And the one who was seated on the throne said, “See, I am making all things new.” 

—Revelation 21: 4-5

Today’s Mass reading from Isaiah talks about a time when infants will not die after a few days. When I heard that at the streamed Mass this morning, I almost dropped my coffee mug. Billy was dying, and here Isaiah spoke of a new world, where we would all live the lifespan that God appointed us. There would be no more crying, or death, or sadness. We would all live together to old age. Isn’t that what every parent wants for their child?

We all loved Billy. I thank you for all the love that you gave this family, that you continue to give this family. Please pray for them. At this time, the state of Ohio is essentially shut down—I don’t know what’s going to happen with the funeral. Thankfully, their families are local, so they have that support here in town and they can be together. Please continue to pray for them.

Seven Quick Takes--Billy

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OK, I have a really freaking great story to tell all of you, if you don’t know it already, but first business: Ave Maria Press is having an ebook sale and my book is included! So go get it!

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OK so, it’s story time.

My Bestest Friend, Tiffany, and her husband, Bill, are some of the nicest people in the world. I won’t say the nicest people because I haven’t met everyone in the world. :)

I have known Tiffany since September of 1996, when we were seated next to each other in Theater I at PHS. (Alphabetical last names). And we just hit it off.

One of her best gifts is that she is absolutely calm and chill about everything. I had to do my treatments in front of her while we were on choir tour? No biggie. I’m injecting myself with insulin? Whatever. I’m in the hospital? OK, cool, can I come visit? She always treated me absolutely normally.

I spent a lot of summer days at her parents’ house, eating dinner with them, even going on vacation with them. We’ve seen Broadway shows together, we have inside jokes…(“Zazu, why am I not….loved?”)

Me and Tiff.

Her husband, Bill, is the perfect person for her. I was so happy when she met him (one of our friends fixed them up, thanks Gary!) and they got married, because he’s such a wonderful guy, and she deserves a wonderful guy!

We’ve been friends for almost twenty-five years.

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So, when Tiff and Bill were expecting their first baby, I was thrilled for them. A baby! YES!

And we were all excited….until he got a really bad diagnosis. So bad that he wasn’t expected to live very long after birth.

Tiff and Bill decided that it didn’t matter—they were going to love on him as long as they had him. They took him places (the zoo, the aquarium, the symphony, the movies), read to him, played music for him, and wrote him letters in journals that they each kept. They wanted to make as many memories as possible with him while he was inside Tiffany and alive.

They named him—Billy the IV. :)

His birthday was set to be St. Patrick’s Day. He has encephalocele, and they didn’t want to risk Tiff going into labor, so Billy was a scheduled C-section.

They arranged for their pastor to be there to baptize him. In the midst of all the virus craziness, the hospital allowed their parents and siblings to come, because they knew time would be short.

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But.

He didn’t die.

He lived.

And is still living.

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Billy is eating. He’s sleeping, he’s grasping his daddy’s finger, he looks at his mommy’s face when she coos at him. He yawns and gives us looks of disdain. :)

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They get to take him home. They get to be parents! At home! Something they didn’t think they’d ever get to do!

I told Tiff last night that I’d never prayed for someone as much as I’d prayed for them and Billy. My prayer journals are full of notes about Billy and his parents, and really desperate prayers for them, for healing, for peace, for…everything, really.

I’ve written many times, including in my book, that God is not a vending machine. Prayer is not a vending machine. We don’t get to say God is good only when he gives us what we want.

God is always good, even when we can’t see it. God always loves us.

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But right now, in this period of time when we all need miracles and good news, we have one—we have Billy and his amazing parents. We have a little boy who was supposed to die, and who is living. This time with him is a precious and amazing gift, and the fact that my friends get to take home a baby, A LIVE BABY, something they didn’t think they’d get to do, is cause for praise to God.

This morning, Billy was taking a nap with his dad. Something that countless babies do—that I did—that you probably did, with one of your parents. But a priceless gift to them.

God is being very good to us.

I shall not die, but I shall live,
    and recount the deeds of the Lord.

—psalm 118:17

Billy the IV with Bill the III

Wednesday notebook

While the COVID 19 virus goes on, I’m going to try to do a Wednesday notebook—a mid-week check in with what I’m doing, reading, watching, and any goodies I find on the internet to share with you. And also let’s have conversation in the comments—how is everyone doing? Let’s get some virtual community!

MAKING:

These brownies from King Arthur Flour are AMAZING. So fudgy. I made them with one cup of chips because that’s all I had—still excellent.

Their English Muffin Toasting Bread is next up in my baking list.

I’m still working on my elementary wrap in Linen Quill from Purl Soho.

Elementary Wrap and book stack!

READING:

Exalted, by Sonja Corbitt

Revelations of Divine Love, by Julian of Norwich

The Red Lotus, by Chris Bohjalian (about…..a pandemic…..)

From the Depths of Our Hearts, Benedict XVI and Cardinal Robert Sarah

Making A Life, Melanie Falick

(and of course my book!)

WATCHING:

The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey (Going to watch all of the Hobbit movies….might as well!)

Knives Out

Links and such:

Social Distancing Tips from a Cloistered Nun (I LOVE Sister Mary Catherine!)

Catholic Coloring Pages and activities for kids!

Magnificat is offering their app for FREE during this—daily Mass readings and other devotions

Maybe have a reset day?

Met Opera streaming!

Illness & Piety

The second station: Jesus Carries His Cross

A lot of dioceses are dispensing their Catholics from attending Mass; some are shutting their churches completely. It’s a strange time to be Catholic in America—what do we do without Mass?

We know that we are required to attend Mass unless we are sick, find ourselves really far from Mass, or for other big reasons (you’ve got a sick kid and you have to stay home to take care of her). Not attending Mass is a mortal sin, but, like all mortal sins, that means there are three criteria for it: Grave matter, full knowledge, and deliberate consent.

If you live in a diocese where the bishop has dispensed you from attending Mass, you’re not committing a mortal sin if you don’t go. We don’t know a lot about this virus. What we do know is that a person can have zero symptoms and be contagious! That’s scary.

Even before the dispensation came down from Ohio’s Catholic bishops, my transplant team had told me that they didn’t want me going to Mass. Was I super pleased with this idea? No. Am I listening to them? yes.

To me, this is very like life right after my transplant. I didn’t attend Mass for three months, because I was severely compromised. To go would not have been a good thing. (And also, it was an uncomfortable thing. Most Catholic churches have wooden pews. When you weigh 90 pounds, your bones really feel that wood, let me tell ya.)

I am being obedient to my doctors, and not going. My health is important and I know they want what is best for us.

I’ve seen some people talking about how our physical health isn’t more important than our spiritual health. This is true—but, that doesn’t mean that we should be reckless. There are saints who were told not to do so many penances, that they were being too hard on their bodies. It’s a balance.

I am NOT suggesting that we skip Mass just for the fun of it. I am saying that at this time it’s important to think about other people at Mass. (And really, all the time…)

People like me aren’t going. But that doesn’t mean that there won’t be people at Mass who take care of immunocompromised people, or work with them. If they get sick, that’s a big problem. So let’s remember basic good practices.

If you’re sick, don’t shake hands at the sign of peace! Use hand sanitizer. Cover your cough. Leave some space between yourself and other parishioners, so you don’t run the risk of getting them sick. If you have the flu, stay home!

The criteria I use to determine how sick I am is thus: If I would miss work, then it’s fine for me to stay home. If someone said, let’s go to Chuy’s, and I wouldn’t go because I feel awful, then I’m sick enough to not go to Mass.

I can see why some bishops are closing churches—because people aren’t doing what is right and prudent. They’re going to Mass and spreading germs everywhere, in flu season, all the time. This is not cool, folks. Use the best practices I outlined above all the time, not just now!

Also, Masses still happen with out a congregation. Carthusian monks, for example, say Mass everyday without a congregation. I imagine that priests will still say Mass, even if the church is empty.

So, what can you do if your dioceses has shut your churches, or if you are staying home from Mass?

• We can make a spiritual communion. This is important!

• We can read the Mass readings (Magnificat is offering its app for free right now—daily Mass readings and devotional readings every day!)

• We can pray the rosary, or parts of the Liturgy of the Hours.

• We can perform spiritual reading.

In this time, you might want to check on your neighbors who are sick or older, and see if you can do anything for them to help them out. Maybe you could pick up their groceries for them or something, or put gas in their car.

Just because we can’t get to Mass doesn’t mean that we can’t still practice our faith. Yes, the Mass is the source and summit of our lives. Yes, it’s vital.

But sometimes life intervenes and we can’t worship the way we’d like to. I’ve experienced that a lot in my life.

St. Teresa of Avila once received instructions from God to build her convent somewhere. Her bishop then told her to build her convent somewhere else. Teresa obeyed the bishop, because she knew she owed obedience to him. She said later, when God asked her about this, that she knew her bishop was telling her what to do and she owed him obedience; she might have imagined what God told her to do. (This story was in the book Be Holy. I’m paraphrasing here.)

Keep calm, guys, and carry on—and PRAY. Don’t rage against your bishop and take offense. Pray. If you can go to Mass, weigh if it’s prudent for you and your family. If you go, act responsibly—don’t crowd pews, cover your cough, don’t shake hands at the sign of peace, etc.

The important thing is to pray, even if you can’t get to Mass.

Seven Quick Takes--Second Friday of Lent

Linking up with Kelly!

I took this picture before Mass last week—I couldn’t resist the light.

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On the blog this week:

Virus Lent

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There’s a story about St. Teresa of Avila and Lent that I think is a propos. She once had a great program of Lenten penances planned. She was going to do everything. It was going to be great!

Then she was sick. For all of Lent. And she complained to the Lord about this. “Lord, I had so many great penances to offer you,” etc.

“This is my Lent for you,” He told her.

Looks like, no matter what our penances and plans were, we’re getting the Lent that Jesus wants for us right now.

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Like I wrote in my last post, I’m essentially living like I did right after my transplant—not really leaving my house, people coming to me. I’m not actually opposed to this, but what makes it scary for me is that the world around me is caught up in it, too. Whenever I’ve been sick before, there’s always been some sense of normalcy around me to cling to—school went on, I could go to the movies when I felt better, etc.

Now, nothing’s normal. Here, schools are closed starting Monday. The bishops’ conference of Ohio has dispensed us all from the obligation to attend Mass—and I wasn’t going to do that anyway, on the advice of my doctors. It’s just weird.

Last night after dinner I went and stood on my porch for a minute. It was a lovely night—the sun was setting, it was warm, I could hear the train coming through town. But it felt so eerily calm, like it does before a big storm.

All that to say, that it’s a weird time.

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If you’re in the same boat I am and can’t go to Mass, make a spiritual communion! And also try to keep the Sabbath holy—which we should be doing anyway, but if nothing else, this gives us time to really use Sunday as a day of rest. We all need rest right now! There are no sports to watch, and probably no sports games to go to. There’s nothing else. So let’s bring back the Sabbath! Let’s live it! (book recommendation: Souls at Rest.)

And also, let’s pray with our families! We should be doing that anyway, but let’s bring it back, because man do we all need prayer right now! (Book recommendation: The Little Oratory)

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If we’re doing book recs, um, mine? :)

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So while I’m here in my cloister I’ve made a list of things to do—writing, of course, so there will be ore writing here on the blog! I’m going to do the long awaited Outlander and Catholicism series, so be on the lookout for that! I’ll also be writing about illness and virtue—how we practice faith in times like this—and I’ll be doing a post on St. Damien of Molokai, who seems appropriate right now.

I’m also going to be baking a lot—mostly bread. I’ve been wanting to get in to the habit of making my own bread, and now I have the time to do it….and I also have time to knit like a crazy person. I have all this time…of course there is prayer, also. Lenten practices are still going. And cleaning the house, of course.

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I’ll also be watching a lot of movies, starting with the Hobbit series, because, why not, and also Knives Out, which I never saw in the theaters but am excited to watch now. I have to have some exciement, right?

Virus Lent

My porch, enjoying some nice late winter sun!

OK, NO, I AM NOT SICK.

So if you were worried about that, relax. :)

However, my team is being abundantly cautious, so I am essentially living like I did immediately post-transplant, which means I”m not really going anywhere and no one sick can come to me. Which is actually the general rule, but now it’s just more….heightened. Fortunately my family members who are local work from home and don’t travel much, except my sister in law, but her travel is domestic and so far she’s fine (thankfully!).

So, for me, no Mass. No My Fair Lady on Saturday (sadness!). No doctor appointments like my diabetes education class. And I’m fine: I mean I’ve got the things I need here to keep the house going and clean, to keep myself fed and medicated.

Which brings me to—-

If you have any burning issues that you want me to write about, let me know because now I have time! :) I think my long-thought-about Outlander and Catholicism series might finally take flight!

I am hoping to keep my adoration hour. I chose it because I am the only one there at the time, and if I’m not going to Mass then I want to be at adoration. Also there are enough seats in there that we don’t have to be cheek and jowl, so there’s plenty of SPACE, and I can wipe down chairs and such with wipes if I want to/have to.

My diocese hasn’t—as of this writing (3/12 at 12:31 PM) cancelled Masses. So Masses are still going on.The governor is limiting big events with crowds and I think he’ll probably come out with an order about that today, banning big gatherings and such to prevent the spread. So far in Ohio we’ve got four cases—three in Cleveland and one in Summit County, which is near Cleveland. I don’t blame the governor for wanting to be cautious.

Let’s keep each other in prayer and let’s be smart, OK? Don’t go to Mass if you’re sick at all. Don’t shake hands at the sign of peace! Don’t crowd people at Mass—let’s give each other room, if at all possible.

I hope we all come through this OK. Praying for all of you—pray for me too? :)

Seven Quick Takes Jumble Bag

linking up with Kelly!

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Around these parts this week…

Yarn Along

My interview for the Ave Explores Lent Podcast is live!

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I’ve started Bullet Journaling again—I’ve missed how it keeps all my lists and various things together, so I’m back to doing that. It’s fun! At least I think it is. I’m a big believer in having my life in one place. I still use my Emily Ley Simplified Planner, but my bullet journal is a place to keep my lists, medical information, travel plans, all sorts of things like that in one place as opposed to scattered throughout the house on pieces of paper.

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Trying to get back in the workout groove—I’ve worked out three days this week so far and hoping I can do it today. I’m just so darn tired. Maybe it’s the weather? It’s really gray here. Hopefully I’ll perk up in a little bit and manage to do something!

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Next Saturday I’m going to see the touring production of My Fair Lady and I am really excited about that. I haven’t been to a show in forever. Really. And I’ve never seen My Fair Lady on stage. So I’m excited about that!

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Favorite thing I’ve cooked this week: Outlander KItchen’s Scotch Broth. Give it a try, it’s really good! (If you can’t find pot or pearl barley, you can use quinoa or couscous instead!) And it’s so not hard. It cooks for a while—so it takes awhile—but it’s mostly hands-off cooking.

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A photo I took last week of Venus and the moon:

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How’s your Lent going? Did we all make it through the first week OK? :)

Yarn Along #95: The blanket is almost done!

Linking up with Ginny!

So the biggest project—literally—is the November blanket. I’m on the last 25% of it so yay! It’s actually pretty heavy to work with now, and I have to settle in for long periods of knitting with it because it’s just so hard to move on and off my lap!

The thing that makes me nervous is trying to block this baby—for people who have knit blankets, do you block them? I just have this image of it being heavy and unwieldly….

The book I’m reading is Sonja Corbitt’s Exalted, which takes us through the Magnificat. I am loving this book—it’s one of my many Lenten reads. I’m reading a chapter a day so I don’t completely devour it in one sitting!

What are you reading and working on right now?

My "Ave Explores: Lent" podcast interview is live!

My conversation with Katie Prejean McGrady for the Ave Explores Lent series is live today! I had a great time talking to her and I hope you enjoy listening to our conversation!